Church.
Why is Church the best RvB character? I bet you ask yourself that same question every day. (And if you use anyone else's name in that question, you're just as useless as they are.) Well, I'm here to provide your answers. That's right, here are multiple examples of why Church is the greatest. Rvb 1: "You know what? I f*cking hate you." RvB 3: "You know what? I could blow up the whole g*d d*mn world with this thing." RvB 4: "ROOKIE! SHUT-UP! JUST SHUT-UP, YOU'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY! GET IN THERE!" RvB 5: "You know, I look at it this way... Either A, we go through there, and get the flag back, or B, we stay here, and I get to kill you. Either way, I win." "Yeah... I've, uh... I've decided I'm not gonna use the teleporter." RvB 6: "RUN! JESUS! RUN!" RvB 8: "SON OF A B*TCH!" "What? Oh, son of a b--!" "I just want you to know... I always hated you. I always hated you the most." RvB 10: "It's really... f*ckin...' cold." "That's exactly what Jimmy kept screaming." RvB 13: "Uh, because she's from Texas... Trust me, it makes sense." "Yeah. That's right. I'm a gay robot." RvB 14: "Oh my g*d. I can't believe I actually died for this war." "Uh, yeah, I guess I did." "Hey, man. What's up, yo?" "Yeah, well, I dunno. You're starting to act kinda suspicious there... other red guy." "What, that's it? Okay? You're not surprised by any of this?" "What the--? Where did my body go? Oh, you gotta be kidding me!!" RvB 15: "Do you wanna go to heaven? 'Cause it's like... ten bucks to get in." "Oh, you don't have it there, huh? Well, uh... that's too bad. Pretty crappy reason to be damned to hell for an eternity." "If he gives you mouth-to-mouth, I'm leavin.'" "I'm leavin.'" "Aw, don't sell yourself short. I don't even know you and I'm about to guide you to heaven for only five bucks." "Because nobody rang a bell. Haha... Seriously, do you have the money or don't you?" "Yes, but only if you give me two dollars!!" RvB 38: "Means 6:00, right? Six--or does it mean, six hun--0600. Does 600 mean minutes? 600 minutes? 'Cause that'd be... that'd be 10:00. Is it 6:00 or is it 10:00?" "Okay, fine, Triangle of Confusion. Rhombus of Terror. Parabola of Mystery--Who cares?! Just get the g*d d*mn show on the road!!" "Okay, we all agree that while the current situation is not totally ironic, the fact that we now have to work together is odd in an unexpected way that defies our normal circumstances. Is everybody happy with that?" Reconstruction 5: Can't we find somewhere nicer to hang out? Hey, maybe there's like, a cool nightclub nearby that you can't get us into either. That would be awesome." "That was f*cking bullsh*t!!" "Which part? How about the part where I got thrown 80 feet in the f*cking air by the g*d d*mn throwing thing!! Don't worry, there's plenty more where that came from. I'll post more when I watch the rest of the episodes... again. And I'll be deleting some of the lesser ones. >> Because I can. Long live Church! Sort of... |
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